One
of the problems that most of us have is that our self-doubt is more prevalent
than our self-belief.
It
is easy to see why.
One
reason is that if we have self-belief in what we are doing we get on and do it
but if self-doubt is there it nags at us, worries and stresses us, makes us
nervous when we are doing things.
Another
reason is that we often find it hard to see what we are good at, particularly
if it means transferring that skill or ability to a different setting. Perhaps
you know somebody who is super-efficient at work but seems to have a totally
disorganised personal life, or maybe someone who seems cool and calm when doing
certain tasks yet seem to fall apart with nerves doing other things?
Self-belief
is, perhaps, less mentioned than self-confidence or self-esteem yet it the
thing that underpins both. If we want to improve our lives in any way we need
be in a place where our self-belief outweighs our self-doubt before we can
succeed.
To
start the ball rolling, write out a list of things you know you are good at.
This helps you strengthen your strengths in your mind. It brings self-belief to
the front of your thoughts where self-doubt usually sits. Once you have written
out your list, do it again as the more you focus on that list the fixed it
becomes in your memory. It is important to do that as will be revealed a little
further down!
Once
you are sure your strengths are firmly fixed in your mind, write a list of
things that you know you are okay at but could be better. Once you have done this
work, systematically, through the list to work out what you need to do to move
that skill or attribute over to your strengths list.
Do
you need a little extra knowledge? Perhaps a bit more practice? Maybe you need
to be a bit fitter?
Whatever
it is write it down next to that attribute. Now rewrite the list, this time in
the order you want to achieve those things. Which thing are you okay at would
you most like to add to your strengths list first? As you work through this
list the greater the number of strengths you gain and as you succeed in moving
things to your strengths list the greater your self-belief becomes.
The
reason for writing these lists and committing your strengths to memory?
The
next time you find yourself in a situations where self-doubt creeps in, or if
you are unsure of yourself or nerves are getting the better of you, think back
to your lists. Which of your strengths would be most appropriate to the
situation right now? It does not matter if they may not seem directly
transferable as they can still help you get through the situation.
For
example, say you are a person who gets nervous at speaking in public yet one of
your strengths is attention to detail. Use your strength, focus more on the
detail of what you are presenting rather than the fact you are doing it in
front of a group of people. Then, the more you do this, speaking in public
becomes less daunting and eventually a new strength.
Self-doubt
plagues us but we can overcome this by strengthening our self-belief. The
better our self-belief the better we can face the obstacles of everyday life
and improve our lives in the way we want.
That
does not mean ignoring the fact that we all have weaknesses as well as
strengths rather that we have faith in our strengths to support us and
neutralise those weaknesses. It means we have the belief in ourselves to meet
the challenges we face.
You
got to have faith in yourself and the belief that you have the strengths to see
you through life.
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